Chestnuts roasting on an open fire and your three-year-old screaming in your ear - sounds cozy, doesn’t it? All the “newness” of unfamiliar people and places coupled with the chaotic nature of the many festivities in which you are participating are a perfect recipe for the dreaded holiday meltdowns. When you head off to grandma’s house for the Christmas Eve party, take some of these tips with you:

• Try to keep a sleep routine. When a young child’s body is used to going to sleep at 8pm, it will continue to push for that. Avoid the tears and put the kid to bed at a normal bed time. If they aren’t falling asleep right away because of the holiday excitement, spend a little extra time reading some good Christmas tales as they doze off.
• Recognize the boring situations and prepare. While your husband’s tradition may be to catch some z’s in the back of the church during the Christmas show, it’s not a long shot to think that the kids will get bored too. Bring some play-doh, coloring books and some headphones when you know there’s a good chance the kids will be looking for something more fun.
• Teach gratitude and gift etiquette ahead of time. Look, aunt Mary doesn’t know that Spongebob Squarepants is all the rage among the kids, so when she shows up with ugly Christmas sweaters be prepared for that good ole’ kid honesty. Before presents are opened, teach the kids how to be thankful and express it. Getting the kids involved in the shopping process can be helpful. Try telling some stories of less-fortunate children.
• Watch their diet. It’s fine if your child doesn’t want to eat Uncle Larry’s peas with soy sauce (although make sure they know how to refuse politely); the real danger is all those yummy sweets floating around. Set a limit and try to stick to it, and let the other relatives know about the sugar threshold. A sweet or two after dinner is perfectly okay, but loading up on sweets will only lead to the inevitable cranky crash later.
• Pick your battles and know when to negotiate. When it comes to seatbelts or other life-saving issues then, yes, it’s worth the battle. Your enthusiasm and example can encourage kids to do things they might not ever do – like greet Cousin Sally with a kiss, brush their teeth, or get ready to go with speed. When words and examples fail, bribe them. “I would love to stay here too honey, but I left my Hershey kisses in the car.” Or “If you get ready for bed now, tomorrow we can do some sleigh riding.” You get the idea.
• Lastly, take a time out. When you see a child heading down the sharp incline to complete meltdown, take a time out. Go outside and take a short, peaceful walk just the two of you. Or find a quiet, dimly-lit room and talk about how the child is feeling. Find out if the child is out for the count or just needed break.